Ruminations from a Cyborg

by Aaron Weir Kelstone

rumination

The act of pondering; meditation.

Cyborg

a human being whose body has been taken over in whole or in part by electromechanical devices

I ruminate because when you are a monkey in the middle you get it from all sides.  Each side wants something, rejects something, fears something, wonders something, or silently holds the gazing eye on the monkey in the middle of things.

EAR 1 EAR 2

Me born deaf ear 1.

Me born something ear 2. what that? No one know…

Ear 1 find deaf school, happy-happy.

Ear 2 hear something, add hearing aid, happy-happy…NOT

Time pass, ear 2 learn tolerate machine hang on body.

But others see hearing aid

me no fit full in deaf world…become HH

later become hearing impaired

later become monkey in the middle

deaf world…school love…hearing world…family no know, no connect

Ear 1 ignore, deaf culture good, sign language good.

Ear 2 hear less.

Time pass

Ear 2 hear less…less…less

Time pass ear 2 hear nothing, join ear 1

lip read learn, stare interpreter learn,

ear 1 now full boss

time pass

ear 2 tell ear 1, me miss sound sometimes

ear 1 tell ear 2, forget it, no need sound

ear 2 say but…ear 1 say shhhhhhhhhhh!

Time pass…long time pass…long, long time pass

CI come, ear 2 wonder, ear 1 say NO!

Time pass, ear 2 fearful think, ear 1 say for-for

time pass, ear 2 say discriminate stop please

ear 2 and ear 1 need connect,

deaf school, deaf culture, sign language all still good

ear 2 say me miss music, miss birds, miss hear children laughing

miss not all, just some.

Ear 1 partner with ear 2

that very good

oppress ear 1, no, ear 2, no

ear 1 and ear 2 no change just become 1

So…

cyborg me now

join toyota prius, join honda insight, join schwarzenegger

others now see wire in head

me no fit in deaf world…become soul traitor

later me label what? Know-NOT

but

still monkey in the middle

ear 1, ear 2 connect

both deaf love,  deaf culture love, sign language love, music love, life love,

do-do me now?